Drawing Nearer to the Throne: Grace and Healing Through Devastating Seasons
"Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need" (Hebrews 4:16, ESV)
I have heard women many times ask the question, “How do I know what God wants me to do?” I have asked it of God myself. Sometimes I feel I receive an answer and sometimes I feel my words are lost and floating away. So, then I begin to ask harder and deeper questions like, “God, I am hurting. I feel alone. I need you. How do I draw closer to you for healing, restoration and grace?” I ask this because perhaps my first question cannot be answered until I allow Him into the space of my daily stresses and more devastating seasons of grief. We need His grace and mercy to heal. But how do we know what that really means and how do we truly approach the throne of God in the midst of our heartbreak?
God’s Grace
Grace is defined as “unmerited divine assistance given to humans for their regeneration or sanctification.” (www.merriam-webster.com) We seek God’s grace to help us through our daily life, but we are especially in need during times of extended grief, stress and loss. Most of us have encountered life-altering stresses and even trauma in our lives. Those are the times we cry out the loudest to Him. It is alright and He wants us to. I think of Him as a benevolent father who comforts His children during their pain. Note that He does not necessarily take our pain away. Many of us are moms who can relate to that. We welcome our children’s trust in us and we allow them to lean on us during their distress, even though we can’t necessarily fix it. It is the same with God. After all, He endowed us with His own attributes.
The past year and a half have caused great anxiety for many in the world. It has affected my own family on a very personal level. Most women can relate to these issues through certain seasons in life but sometimes it feels like a massive pile-up at once and we are devastated feeling helpless and hopeless. What do we do then? How do we heal? What does our prayer-life look like then? Who or what do we turn to for peace and recovery from those wounds?
I hardly have the all the answers, especially now. But I will turn to what I do know. I know that God still sits on the throne. I know that He still loves me. I know that He hears me. And I know that His word is true. If He offers me grace and mercy, then who am I to not receive it? I often say we should give ourselves grace and time for healing but in reality, it is God offering it and we should rest in it.
We sometimes must go through fiery seasons so that we are refined and strengthened to continue His work while we yet live here on earth. That is true but perhaps we need to allow the “cooling off” period after refinement before proceeding. Perhaps we need to humbly cry out to and lean into God for a time. Then, and only then, are we able to answer the first question, “How do I know what God wants me to do?” If God gives us “unmerited divine assistance for our regeneration”, then we should take heed and allow Him to do so.
Healing and Restoration
Recovery in times of great stress takes time. Many of us strive to quickly get through the stress of grief so that we can get on to achieving our goals as if healing has a time frame. I am guilty. In the midst of the work of a fledgling ministry and new startup business, my sister passed away suddenly and shortly after, I became very ill with Covid-19. Since then, we have lost two more family members and I lost my career of twenty years. On a global scale, our current world seems to be imploding and chaotic.
Through pain and grief, God’s gift shows itself like a sunrise renewing our strength - physically, emotionally and mentally. He encourages us to lean into Him fully and completely. I am slowly understanding what His grace truly means. He has allowed me to experience something personally heart-breaking in order to deepen my compassion for others and even myself. Attempting to rush His grace only serves to impede the healing.
Loving the Scars
Jesus is no stranger to pain and grief. Dying on the cross was debilitating on a level I cannot even comprehend. The scars of His crucifixion and the piercing of His side gives full proof of His grief, pain and suffering but they also prove the healing given the proper time of restoration. We know His work is not yet finished either as we await His return and the full restoration of humanity. Even though the scars speak of His pain, those who love Him also love the scars because of their significance. Let us lean into Him and also learn to love our own scars as they teach us deeper love and compassion. Let us simply allow time with God for wounds to heal and the scars to strengthen.
Practical Guidance in the Word of God
Practical guidance for full restoration after devastating circumstances comes directly from the word of God. He asks us to pray without ceasing. “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thess 5:16-18).
Worship. We know King David worshiped with abandon through times of great stress as well as through times of triumph. That should give us hope through our own despair. To me, worship seems to open up a direct portal to the throne of God allowing emotions to flood and open up our vulnerable hearts. Only then, can he begin knitting it back together, albeit through scars. And that’s okay. “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3).
Finally, reach out to others. The very act of helping others tends to hasten the healing for ourselves. I can attest to this idea firsthand and in ways too many to count as I open myself up to others. My own grief becomes my testimony.
I think we often cry out to God and then sit back waiting for the restoring “feelings” to happen. Often, we wait until we aren’t depressed, stressed or grieving anymore before we reach out to others or even Jesus. We wonder, then, why He hasn’t changed our circumstances or healed our grief. It is certainly important to allow for quiet, alone time, but we can pray, worship and reach out to others even during our most difficult season; even if we do not feel like it. Let us do it anyway. Some of my most gut-wrenching blogs and sincere prayers were during the time of my open and bleeding wounds of grief and often through loud sobs of grief.
Sisters in Life/Sisters in Christ
Today is my birthday. This is the first birthday in 59 years that I did not have my sister in my everyday life. I miss her calling me as early in the day as she could get away with and singing me “Happy Birthday” in a shrill bird-like, silly voice. What a thing to wake up to! But I miss it so much! I am thinking of her today and I am smiling.
Regardless of whatever season we are going through in this life, we can come together and offer each other encouragement. We do not have to understand or try to fix someone’s struggles in order to have compassion. I believe this is what it means to be the light of Christ. If we lean into God and His Word and reach out to others as He has commanded us to, we can heal and restore from difficult circumstances. We heal with scars and as in the physical realm, they are often stronger than the original, more tender tissue; if we only allowed the time to do so within God’s grace.
Tonya Noren
August 19, 2021